Love and Other Near-Death Experiences: A Novel 
asked by goonball on November 27, 2006 7:12 PM
Hello. My name is Robert, and I haven’t been dead for sixty-three days now.
If he hadn’t bought those crummy towels, Rob would be six feet under. But his poor shopping sense accidentally set off a convoluted chain of events that meant he lived when all those others died in the pub explosion. Okay, maybe it wasn’t the ugly towels that saved his life. Perhaps it was some other random action, some other small movement that was the utterly trivial yet vitally important factor. And that’s the real problem.
Now, with his wedding fast approaching, Rob suddenly finds himself paralyzed with indecision–about Every. Little. Thing. He just can't be sure which seemingly innocuous choice will mean the difference between life and death: Should he wash the fork or the knife first? Should he step out of the shower with his left leg or his right leg? Red sweater or blue? One thing is certain: His fiancée, Jo, is at her wits’ end.
To save his relationship and his sanity, Rob embarks on a quest to find out why he’s still breathing. When he meets up with others who have had similar lifesaving near misses, he figures the answer must be close. But fate may just catch them yet, for Rob’s search to understand why he’s still alive might well turn out to be the very thing that kills them all.
Filled with the barbed and sparkling dialogue that made Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About a cult hit, Mil Millington’s Love and Other Near-Death Experiences is a hilarious existential romantic comedy about second guesses and second chances.
If he hadn’t bought those crummy towels, Rob would be six feet under. But his poor shopping sense accidentally set off a convoluted chain of events that meant he lived when all those others died in the pub explosion. Okay, maybe it wasn’t the ugly towels that saved his life. Perhaps it was some other random action, some other small movement that was the utterly trivial yet vitally important factor. And that’s the real problem.
Now, with his wedding fast approaching, Rob suddenly finds himself paralyzed with indecision–about Every. Little. Thing. He just can't be sure which seemingly innocuous choice will mean the difference between life and death: Should he wash the fork or the knife first? Should he step out of the shower with his left leg or his right leg? Red sweater or blue? One thing is certain: His fiancée, Jo, is at her wits’ end.
To save his relationship and his sanity, Rob embarks on a quest to find out why he’s still breathing. When he meets up with others who have had similar lifesaving near misses, he figures the answer must be close. But fate may just catch them yet, for Rob’s search to understand why he’s still alive might well turn out to be the very thing that kills them all.
Filled with the barbed and sparkling dialogue that made Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About a cult hit, Mil Millington’s Love and Other Near-Death Experiences is a hilarious existential romantic comedy about second guesses and second chances.
Reviews
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I enjoyed Mil's website and one of the first books "Things..." so I was really interested in this one. It is a much different read than the previous book since the main character actually has a purpose this time around. While there's definately the same burst out laughing humor, it's a different kind of book entirely. Mil definately experiments with a lot of different kinds of characters in this book and uses their differences and similarities to carry along the quest. All in all, it was a quick read; I was entertained. Worst part was that I was mildly annoyed at the vulgarity of the one character Elizabeth - it was amusingly balanced by her voluminous lexicon! But hey, that's the British - err... English. : )
reviewed by soulful on November 28, 2006 9:40 AM
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I absolutely loved Millington's first two novels, and I have to say this is a bit of a step down in quality. The razzle-dazzle writing, featuring snappy one-liners and hilarious repartee is all there, however, the framework just isn't quite as good and is unfortunately coincidentally similar to Nick Hornby's last book, A Long Way Down. The protagonist is Rob Garland (a name also a little too close to High Fidelity's Rob Fleming), a 30ish late night jazz DJ who's having problems getting psyched up about his impending wedding (elements which also bring to mind High Fidelity's Rob). It seems that two months ago, he cheated death by being late to an appointment in a building where an accident killed all inside. Since then he falls into paralyzing bouts of indecision, based on the premise that one's life can turn on the most inconsequential of acts.
When his fiancee sits him down and tells him he must cure himself before they get married, he takes the plunge and goes on an quest to sort himself out (again, rather like High Fidelity's Rob). This rather aimless quest involves him teaming up with others who have cheated death. First he meets a young American soldier who wasn't blown up with some buddies in Bosnia, and now appoints himself Rob's facilitator. Next is an the world's most acerbic woman, a suicidaly depressed English teacher in her late 40s who stepped out to get smokes while her Bulgarian hotel burned down in the middle of the night. Finally, there is a beautiful Welsh Wiccan woman who warns Rob about an evangelical Christian sect who is targeting those who've undone God's will by cheating death. The dynamics of this quartet of exceedingly different people is unfortunately similar to A Long Way Down, although Millington writes in a much more laugh-out-loud-funny style.
The story rattles along at an increasingly frantic pace, which helps to disguise the relative thinness of it, and gags and humor are about all that holds it together. Millington does snappy dialogue and nasty humor better than just about anyone, and it's here in spades. Every character (aside from the American of course) oozes killer comebacks and hilarious one-liners. There are also some of the funniest -- though not explicit -- sex scenes I've read. As in Millington's previous two books, there's a kind of melancholy romantic spirit underlying the entire enterprise which makes it somewhat sweet and hard not to like.
When his fiancee sits him down and tells him he must cure himself before they get married, he takes the plunge and goes on an quest to sort himself out (again, rather like High Fidelity's Rob). This rather aimless quest involves him teaming up with others who have cheated death. First he meets a young American soldier who wasn't blown up with some buddies in Bosnia, and now appoints himself Rob's facilitator. Next is an the world's most acerbic woman, a suicidaly depressed English teacher in her late 40s who stepped out to get smokes while her Bulgarian hotel burned down in the middle of the night. Finally, there is a beautiful Welsh Wiccan woman who warns Rob about an evangelical Christian sect who is targeting those who've undone God's will by cheating death. The dynamics of this quartet of exceedingly different people is unfortunately similar to A Long Way Down, although Millington writes in a much more laugh-out-loud-funny style.
The story rattles along at an increasingly frantic pace, which helps to disguise the relative thinness of it, and gags and humor are about all that holds it together. Millington does snappy dialogue and nasty humor better than just about anyone, and it's here in spades. Every character (aside from the American of course) oozes killer comebacks and hilarious one-liners. There are also some of the funniest -- though not explicit -- sex scenes I've read. As in Millington's previous two books, there's a kind of melancholy romantic spirit underlying the entire enterprise which makes it somewhat sweet and hard not to like.
reviewed by nexus on November 29, 2006 1:50 PM
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I've (nearly) finished "Love and..." and while that may lead you to think I'm summarily unqualified to up and "review" the book, having not even completed it, I'd say that it's the journey that counts and not so much the destination and the journey insofar has been absolutely brilliant.
Keeping true to Mil Millington's own personal sense of utter irreverence, skittishness and vaguely esoteric mile-long jokes, Love expresses itself as wholly unique, smart and well executed.
The main character is a bit of a nutcase, but that's fantastic. He agonizes over every smallish decision, from which pen to use to (I'd assume) how many sheets of toilet paper to soil, worried that one course of action over the next might cause him to get hit by a bus. Nevermind the inherent problem with someone who thinks so cyclically as this, (what if he were to be "bussed" while agonizing over such a decision, et cetera) he proceeds on a "quest" to find himself, and straighten himself out since a near-death experience that should have had him killed spared him after a seemingly simple, mindless choice earlier in the day.
The mere fact that Mil isn't writing just another "Things My Girlfriend..." or even another "A Certain Chemistry" shows his versatility, and perhaps his openness to merely career-crushing, devastatingly short-sighted risk. It also allows his true talent to pour out.
Think: If this were another 300 pages of things he's argued about, perhaps set in a slightly different setting, with a slightly longer-haired Ursula redux, how tiresome that would be. That was a great strength of Chemistry, but it's just so refreshing that he completely reinvents his storylines so that they somehow manage to incorporate his brilliant sense of humor while simultaneously doing almost nothing to remind you of his earlier pieces.
I absolutely love this novel, and I'm glad Mil has decided to allow us the privilege of another look inside his bizarrely organized mind. Pick this up, for yourself or as a gift, to anyone who might enjoy a bit of "off-his-rocker" comedy that's smart (and sometimes a bit erudite) and perfect all around.
Keeping true to Mil Millington's own personal sense of utter irreverence, skittishness and vaguely esoteric mile-long jokes, Love expresses itself as wholly unique, smart and well executed.
The main character is a bit of a nutcase, but that's fantastic. He agonizes over every smallish decision, from which pen to use to (I'd assume) how many sheets of toilet paper to soil, worried that one course of action over the next might cause him to get hit by a bus. Nevermind the inherent problem with someone who thinks so cyclically as this, (what if he were to be "bussed" while agonizing over such a decision, et cetera) he proceeds on a "quest" to find himself, and straighten himself out since a near-death experience that should have had him killed spared him after a seemingly simple, mindless choice earlier in the day.
The mere fact that Mil isn't writing just another "Things My Girlfriend..." or even another "A Certain Chemistry" shows his versatility, and perhaps his openness to merely career-crushing, devastatingly short-sighted risk. It also allows his true talent to pour out.
Think: If this were another 300 pages of things he's argued about, perhaps set in a slightly different setting, with a slightly longer-haired Ursula redux, how tiresome that would be. That was a great strength of Chemistry, but it's just so refreshing that he completely reinvents his storylines so that they somehow manage to incorporate his brilliant sense of humor while simultaneously doing almost nothing to remind you of his earlier pieces.
I absolutely love this novel, and I'm glad Mil has decided to allow us the privilege of another look inside his bizarrely organized mind. Pick this up, for yourself or as a gift, to anyone who might enjoy a bit of "off-his-rocker" comedy that's smart (and sometimes a bit erudite) and perfect all around.
reviewed by macfan on November 29, 2006 2:52 PM