I Shop Therefore I Am: Compulsive Buying & the Search for Self 
asked by kmf on November 6, 2006 1:54 AM
Compulsive buying is a serious, often secretive affliction, with profound emotional, social, occupational, and financial consequences. As many as a quarter of us have problems with buying, and studies suggest that between one and six percent of the population are full-fledged compulsive buyers. I Shop,Therefore I Am: Compulsive Buying and the Search for Self brings together, for the first time, the most important thinking about this disorder. As more and more therapists encounter compulsive buying (whether as a presenting problem or revealed in the course of ongoing therapy), the need for an in-depth clinical understanding of the disorder has grown. Dr. Benson has responded admirably to that need with a practical, comprehensive, and wonderfully readable work. A Jason Aronson Book
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This book is, at best, mediocre and I agree with the reviewer who said it costs too much. A well-written, well-chosen, well-edited series of essays on overshopping would have been worth the price. Not this relatively simplistic analysis.
For example, we hear (over and over and over) that people who shop compulsively do so to avoid emotional pain in their lives: they shop to manage feelings. I do believe I grasped that by about the 5th repetition. This obvious point is repeated again and again and again in different essays, which means that there was a mind-numbing sameness to many of them.
And a really good psychology book shouldn't do that. One essay, two at the most, to make the basic points - then on to something more substantive. For example, is childhood sexual assault an important variable in overshopping? What about physical abuse? What about child neglect, or present-day illness or disability? I didn't see any of that addressed.
Secondly, there is no consideration of what to do when overshoppers have other very serious mental health problems - even though it is stated that other problems, such as overeating, often coexist. It seems to me that the priorities in this case would be as follows:
1 - don't commit suicide; 2 - stay out of the hospital; 3 - avoid mania and depression and other extreme moods that cause immediate and serious crises; 4 - get enough sleep; 5 - avoid alcohol and other drugs; 6 - make sure you have a stable, violence free place to live; 7 - fill the day with structured activities, work if possible - the order I put things in might be questioned, but the fact that all of these things are more important than stopping overshopping is not.
The essay on clothes is particularly poor. It is stated too many times that "clothes reveal as much as they conceal." first of all, I got that after the 2nd time. secondly, in many parts of the world, this is demonstrably untrue. women wear the chador and it is designed to be as ugly and unrevealing as possible. I have heard that underneath it, women often dress up to impress each other, but in public they are to be concealed. similar points might be made about nun's habits and the head coverings that married European women wore in the Middle Ages.
so the treatment of clothes was very, very simple, and very much focused on current times and Western sensibilities, making me wonder why it was written. What is considered appropriate wear for women has changed dramatically over the past 200 years. Are women from religious families more or less likely to buy clothes compulsively, or does it not matter? How does the "obesity epidemic" affect clothes buying? (other than the obvious - that people need larger sizes. are overweight people more or less likely to buy clothes compulsively?
Finally, I did not care much for the conclusions, which involved praising simplicity circles and debtor's anonymous. it seems to me that compulsive shoppers probably tend to be people who need to get in touch with and manage their own feelings (see above), and so telling them what to do seems counterproductive. Of course basic financial information needs to be imparted, but TELLING clients how to find meaning in their lives seems the opposite of what a good therapist should be doing. Letting clients discover it for themselves, which may have nothing to do with a simplicity circle, seems a lot better.
I think this is recommended only for therapists who need basic information, because IMO you won't get much more than that here.
Full disclosure: I went to the author's website and I was not impressed with her "stopping overshopping" program, which retails for $350.00, and the lack of data she has for the success of the program - her success stories were people ID'd by their initials. That didn't significantly change my view of the book, but I do think her program is too simple, as is this book.
For example, we hear (over and over and over) that people who shop compulsively do so to avoid emotional pain in their lives: they shop to manage feelings. I do believe I grasped that by about the 5th repetition. This obvious point is repeated again and again and again in different essays, which means that there was a mind-numbing sameness to many of them.
And a really good psychology book shouldn't do that. One essay, two at the most, to make the basic points - then on to something more substantive. For example, is childhood sexual assault an important variable in overshopping? What about physical abuse? What about child neglect, or present-day illness or disability? I didn't see any of that addressed.
Secondly, there is no consideration of what to do when overshoppers have other very serious mental health problems - even though it is stated that other problems, such as overeating, often coexist. It seems to me that the priorities in this case would be as follows:
1 - don't commit suicide; 2 - stay out of the hospital; 3 - avoid mania and depression and other extreme moods that cause immediate and serious crises; 4 - get enough sleep; 5 - avoid alcohol and other drugs; 6 - make sure you have a stable, violence free place to live; 7 - fill the day with structured activities, work if possible - the order I put things in might be questioned, but the fact that all of these things are more important than stopping overshopping is not.
The essay on clothes is particularly poor. It is stated too many times that "clothes reveal as much as they conceal." first of all, I got that after the 2nd time. secondly, in many parts of the world, this is demonstrably untrue. women wear the chador and it is designed to be as ugly and unrevealing as possible. I have heard that underneath it, women often dress up to impress each other, but in public they are to be concealed. similar points might be made about nun's habits and the head coverings that married European women wore in the Middle Ages.
so the treatment of clothes was very, very simple, and very much focused on current times and Western sensibilities, making me wonder why it was written. What is considered appropriate wear for women has changed dramatically over the past 200 years. Are women from religious families more or less likely to buy clothes compulsively, or does it not matter? How does the "obesity epidemic" affect clothes buying? (other than the obvious - that people need larger sizes. are overweight people more or less likely to buy clothes compulsively?
Finally, I did not care much for the conclusions, which involved praising simplicity circles and debtor's anonymous. it seems to me that compulsive shoppers probably tend to be people who need to get in touch with and manage their own feelings (see above), and so telling them what to do seems counterproductive. Of course basic financial information needs to be imparted, but TELLING clients how to find meaning in their lives seems the opposite of what a good therapist should be doing. Letting clients discover it for themselves, which may have nothing to do with a simplicity circle, seems a lot better.
I think this is recommended only for therapists who need basic information, because IMO you won't get much more than that here.
Full disclosure: I went to the author's website and I was not impressed with her "stopping overshopping" program, which retails for $350.00, and the lack of data she has for the success of the program - her success stories were people ID'd by their initials. That didn't significantly change my view of the book, but I do think her program is too simple, as is this book.
reviewed by bigdv on November 7, 2006 11:29 PM
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I greatly appreciate Dr. Benson's survey of essays on the topic of shopping and compuslive overshopping. This book is chock-full of interesting articles that have really opened my eyes about these issues that are far too often dismissed as silly. The trend toward increasing debt and overshopping is enormous and Dr. Benson appears to be at the forefront of sounding the alarm. This book is not a quick read. I received it almost a year ago and am still re-reading much of it. But I highly recommend it, especially for therapists like myself, and for anyone who thinks he or she might have a problem with shopping or spending. Thank you Dr. Benson for your knowledge, passion, and ability to bring many diverse articles and essays into one book.
reviewed by perfect10 on November 9, 2006 1:40 PM